The changes in 2011 that make it what it is now.

My failure in Korea to not recognize my own recurring and permanent illness has done nothing but pull me away from all that I've worked for on my own and what I dreamed of to achieve more so. i had no choice but lose my job, apartment, friends, things I cherished and all the others dreams of returning back to Korea to teach my students the good values I did my best to impart upon them along with a strong backbone of English. I'm lost in my own home town of Milwaukee feeling like a gigantic living space occupation that could so easily stop moving and become a statue. My own motivation to keep moving and traveling is but a hope that I must keep pushing forward. I know the task is damn near Insurmountable. My Job now is almost Impossible. And thus I must have to push harder than ever to overcome my own illness, otherwise I may just as well slide off the mountains that I so wish to see again. I did it for 7 years with prosperity and avarice and sadly ignorance that I had cured myself. Now after fully accepting that my illness is like a fallen angel forever sitting with me, I only ask how to take its wings and soar without the hubris knowing that they might break on me once again..

Jammin' Jangyu in January and Fuckin' Fightin' February! Part 1...

Alright well seeing as I've stopped my post regarding what I got into Austrialia and China considering that those adventure areas are best kept off private record until I have figured out what to post and what not to...Why not regale you with some other adventures that have happened much more recently in my life...
HMM.. what should I go with first?
Week 2 of January:
Man, this weekend had me going up to Suncheon to some Jazz bar with a few of my more "liked" friends. However getting up there was a freaking trial considering none of them knew when the last buses left and shit. Furthermore they got all bitchy and blowing my buzz (I'd started drinking at noon early that day) so I said fruck and had to get us a damn cab. I wasn't havin' it. We managed to haggle a cabbie for about a 100,000 won for a two hours drive.. not a bad deal.. and when we got there there was little fanfare for all the bullshit we went thru to get there. Finally as the night progressed some of the peeps we met wanted to noraebang but they hated on us like little bitches. We were all about goin but they told us the wrong fucking place to go to. They faked like they changed their minds and went to some other joint but truth be told they were chickenshits who couldn't even fess up to being a bunch of whiny bitches who didn't want to get shown up by our awesome singing and party skillz.. Suncheon Haters.. We then had to catch buses drunkenly early in the morn to Busan then from there to our respective cribs.
Most of the rest of the January I just cracked out playin COD:black ops mostly to keep myself to keep myself outta trouble and conserve money. Was Jammin' at the like a boss holding down the spot and had a straight Miltown awesome time with my new LED Tv and high-speed Internet while dranking down the drank and the chillin' like a villin'.
And of course there was the 24th annual Polar Bear SWIM at HAEUNDAE....(see upcoming post on that for the details.)
Then Fuckin' February hit... and man.. It was too freaking wild!!
First there's the Packers winning SuperBowl XLV the first weekend!!!I had a bunch of days off due to Lunar New Year's and there was high spirits but a tinge of sadness that I didn't get to share it with my family at my bro's Superbowl ballerholic crib.
I must've gotten freaking cooped up playing Games and workin' out prison style for those weeks in January cause I foolishly decided to go off to Changwon to get hammered like old times. Live it up old style for a weekend for old times sake..Suffice to say, That didn't end well... it ended with me fighting the first fucking foreigner I met when I arrived in Korea nearly two years ago.. and of course winning... Wait for part 2 to hear about this lovely story along with Beirut Breast bankshots in Seoul, Busan Beer Blasters and more!!

Hanging with the Mongrel Mob at Poverty Bay

I hopped a plane to Auckland, New Zealand after my .45 For the record, Air New Zealand provided me the BEST flight I've ever had! Plenty of free drinks, hospitality and all around good price for the package. Now I'm only glossing over all the things I did while I was in New Zealand. But the one that sticks in my mind was surfing in Poverty Bay and drinking with the Mongrel Mob Gang of Gisborne. These guys are repudiatedly HARDCORE. They have been in a long beef with the Black Power gang over turf. They are known for killing rival gang members with anything they can find, raping and straight up gangbanging chicks (including their rivals own family members!) and partying like Rockstars on Crystal Meth. Now I was staying with a social worker named Sarah who let me stay at her farm house as long as I cleaned, helped paint and generally do some minor tasks farm work. I liked it there. It was very peaceful and had a great vibe about the land. She informed me to be careful of the Mongrels as they are rather a violent lot. However, they are typically only violent to other gangbangers.
Now, one day while walking along the famous beach Captain Cook landed on when he discovered New Zealand, Poverty Bay, I happened along some rather "thuggish" looking Maori guys hanging around in the parking lot. I mean "thuggish as in they were covered in various hardcore tatoos, piercing and looking like they were able to eat a hammer and crap out coffin nails. Sadly I didn't have a camera or the massive balls to start snapping pics of these guys.. Some were rather young and not nearly as tatted or scarred but they all gathered around the old guys.They were blasting music as they drank the field of unopened beer bottles strewn about the picnic Tables they had commandeered. After a general peace pipe offering and a little charm, I was invited to drink and hang out with them. Now I'm not Eminem but my decent freestyle skills impressed them. So much so, the eldest Mongrel went tit-for-tat with poetic free verses about New Zealand, kicking ass, not taking any shit from Black Power cunts with me. Now generally I try to not get too involved in gang affiliation activity and I was relieved that the Police started making passes on the nearby road. Most memorable was the Hongi I received from the lead Mongrel. If you don't know its a New Zealand custom from the Maori as a greeting. I was glad I knew about it! Since with my experiences with the GD's, Bloods and Latin Kings of NorthSide Milwaukee, if a gang member get nose-to-fucking-nose with you or to use the vernacular "all up in yo grill" you best be be prepared to beat some ass! But in Maori culture its perceived as a greeting or to literally "take in one's breath". It signifies acceptance into the group and no longer being an outsider. I was rather pleased by this and am happy to say that its one of the coolest things I did in New Zealand during my near month living there. I made my way from Auckland to Gisborne to Wellington via Nakedbus to Picton via Ferry to ChristChurch via Train. It was October by the time I jumped an Emirates Flight to Sydney. Check the Austrialia post to see what happened next in my harrowing tale. (please note this blog is a work in progress, I will flesh out the details and add more stories as I find time, so check back and read apost again sometimes it might change!!! kinda like watching the Director's cut of a movie!!)

Being an Ordained Gnostic Shaman

For half shits and giggles and another half out of helping a friend get married if his preacher backed out due to health issues.. I went and got ordained online. Super easy, it was really a joke, but now I'm taking it rather serious since I've been getting asked to help people with spiritual crisis' ... for more info and to laugh your balls off check this link.


I'm an Ordained Minister but never told you what Religion.. First off.... FUCK RELIGIONS!!! They serve a purpose to help many sheep, but not this fucking Wolf.

"Faith is the the Engine of Religion, Religion is the vehicle of Control, fueled by the blood of Martyrs. Knowledge is the Engine of Wisdom, Wisdom is the vehicle of Truth, fueled by the Experiences of our lives"----ME

I'm Gnostic(meaning to know), I KNOW there is a "God" but not a part of ANY Gnostic sect or religion. I'm a Gnostic Shaman and don't waste my time trying to belong to a group or use any of some of the rather boring texts they hold to. Stuff you find on Gnosticism on the web is just as convoluted as other organized religions. Even Buddhism will attempt to control you if you let it, but all religions have some nuggets of truth but they use them to get your money, life, time and try to make you choke down some pretty crazy shit!

Gnostics let you make up you own damned mind.

suffice to say here are some principles I have discovered and live by:

"Ignorance is the source of all sin."

"Split a piece of wood and you will find ME, Lift up a rock and I AM there." meaning the fullness of God is everywhere and you don't need to go to a church to find you idea of God.

I call it the fullness because Gnostics hold onto the idea that the Creator God (Demiurge) is false and should not worshiped because of the inherent flaws of Positive(Yin) and Negative(Yang) that guide this universe. If the Creator is not perfect than how can we know perfection? Good and Bad are flawed concepts but Evil exists and there is waayyyyy more to this life, the universe and everything than just what we can percieve or even abstractly construct.
I go by Ideas not beliefs and continue to do my best to accomplish the first step in being Gnostic.... Know Thyself.

I have spent countless hours trying to understand my purpose using a philosophical approach and using knowledge and truth as my tools towards finding the answer. I found that in the end sometimes we are just a piece of the puzzle of the fullness and that I'm predisposed to certain idiosyncrasies.

2010: January to September: The buildup to fucked up!!

Now that Its 2011 and anyone who reads this will want me to live up to the header of
wacky shit.. Let's begin with how my 2010 panned out.

January: I began 2010 waking up in a jjimjilbang after Rite of Passage blew my mind to the Milky Way and back! Due to the blowback of the 2009 Xmas party incident (a different post to say the least) I kept to myself for the majority of month, cracking out hard playing Call of Duty. I began training in a MMA gym in Changwon and polar bear swam the pacific at Haeundae, finding myself on Korean news channels in the process. You may think that swimming in frigid water is foolish, but nothing helps to remind someone they are alive when you have borderline hypothermia!

February: I found myself in Seoul a few times, hanging with new friends and having fun getting into trouble. Losing my camera during a breakdance competition at an all-you-can-drink night club was one of the trouble nights. I had to be carried off the sidewalk that night as I was too drunk to stand, I was lucky the girls I was with were cool about dealing with my drunk freesylin'ass. I also had to castrate Minion. I still can't believe I watched her do it too, it was brutal. But, Minion was pissing everywhere! what was I to do? I just hated having to use that term when I was talking to the vet.. Nueter just sounds nicer..

March:Not much to report except dealing with a motorcycle that refused to ever be fixed for longer than ten minutes. I still have the piece of crap and I'm not wasting another dime on it! I swear the thing is cursed. I did have fun finding out that some really cool people lived in Jinhae with me. The "gang" has since dispersed but they aren't forgotten. Great times began abounding as we hung at at my crib more often than not. I also began teaching Tyler how to ride a motorcyle.. which went over great.. he crashed it within three days and broke several ribs.

April: ahh April.. the month I was chased by Korean Police for riding my motorcycle on the freeway to Daegu. That was a blasty! I recall pulling the foreigner card hard on them in order to get outta that jam. April is the month I met Sybil after a hard night of drinking in Daegu. This would be the beginning of a string of visits to Daegu to spend time with her. But it all started with the night I met her at Thursday party, wearing a toga and looking pretty good actually. Little was I to know that she would be the chick that would end up leaving me one week before a trip we planned a trip to New Zealand, Australia and southeast Asia. I think April was also the month "the gang" got so drunk at my crib that I'd be breaking a promise to speak of the stuff we did that night.

May: Rite of Passage and my trip to Japan were two of the big points of awesome in May. I visited an old friend in Tokyo, Yuko!! That weekend was great spending Mother's day with her family and just catching up. I was so pleased to live up to my promise of coming to visit her. I even read it from her high school yearbook. To think I had not seen this girl in 9 years, but she was the same as ever. Also playing sports in Jangyu with everyone from Joe's Memorial day party was alot of fun when coming down off a bunch of West African medicine. . It was quite a treat to find clarity after 36 hours of pure introspection. It was proabaly the greatest rite of Passage I ever had. Plenty of late night trists with some of "the gang" also made for a fun month. Especially with my introduction to "Always Sunny" a show I love do this day. I also splurged on celebrating Cinco De Mayo with Tacos, Corona and Nachos. Great times!

June: Going up to visit Sybil to begin planning the trip was mostly what I did in June. Along with trying to fix the motorcycle that decided it like breaking down in Daegu. More late nights and gaming kept me busy. Along with trying to figure out how to break it to Sybil that Lindy was on her way in August to visit. I also got to visit the penis park and a bunch of awesome caves systems with Sybil. The penis park is where I really missed not having a good camera. Plenty of funny and rather arty looking 12 feet tall dick totems lined the coastline. It was an incredible site to see!

July: I was soo busy sweating my ass off and hanging out with chicks each night that I barely have a consistent memory of July. The memory that stands out the most was the mud festival. Sybil and I partied the whole way there on a bus full of other teachers. When we got there the soldiers were causing mayhem with throwing clay and mud at everyone.I had alot of fun fashioning a pair of breasts out of clay and wearing them around. But then tragedy struck, first I had to help a girl who got slammed in the mud pit only the then have to REALLY help a soldier who straight-up dislocated his ankle nearly off. I was able to assess him and reassure him but other than get him to the ambulance there was little I could do. The girl ended up having a concussion but was ok. I did party hard that night with Sybil, but already cracks in our relationship were forming and it was getting apparent that things might go south. I also traveled with Sybil to Bjindo Island where we had a messed up time sleeping on a roof of an abandoned building and then climbing up the mountains.

August: This was when everything hit the fan. I was getting fucked over by my job. I was working three different schools a week. I was losing out on money and my damn motorcycle was pissing me off so bad I wanted to murder the pile of shit! Lindy came to visit for two weeks and spent half of it crying to me about how much she missed me, the other half was spent well...screaming how much she missed me.. Now I'm NOT going to write about Lindy in these posts... My relationship with her deserves its own fucking blog!! So suffice to say from this little "visit" Sybil dumped my ass like a gangster dumps a corpse in an abandoned well! But she had every right to. While Lindy was staying with me I could just tell Sybil would dump me, I was less concerned with losing my girlfriend and more concerned with having to re-plan the entire trip we were to take by myself. I took her to a few nice spots and tried to have fun showing her some new spots. Funny sidenote, my cat Minion HATES her ass and it was funny how upset he got around her. I think he senses something I try to ignore... but more on that another post. This month would be the beginning of a wild and crazy journey that has taken me to 6 countries, 3 continents and nearly took my sanity.
Let's start with the first leg of the journey: Milwaukee. Luckily I got my flight ticket covered by my failing school which was relief. I had to head back to my city of origin to mete out the duties of Best Man at Josh and Robin's wedding. For those of you not understanding what those duties are it includes throwing the Bachelor party, getting the groom-to-be in some wild ass trouble typically with the police, getting him out of said trouble, giving him the ring during the ceremony and of course giving the best damn speech at the reception congratulating him. In between all that I had to play catch up with alot of people who held various parties and events in my name. The three weeks I was back, I swear I had only about two minutes to myself. But the event that stands out happend in September 3 days before I was to leave for New Zealand.

September: Let's get this straight. I love guns. I believe that if you are responsible you should have the right to pack heat. Since I'd been living in Korea for nearly two years, I missed carrying a handgun with me. The cold steel is a heavy reminder to be on my best behavior. Now I'd met this cute skinny girl a week prior to leaving for New Zealand. She's a tough chick who was in the army and certainly the kind of chick who don't take shit. She was accompanying me as I met up some friends for a night out drinking. After a night of catching up with some old school friends and the night was coming to a close sitting outside my brother's house drinking PBR 40oz, I ended up knowing why having a gun also gives you the right to be a hero when the call comes in. A car pulls up and parks a few house down from us. A young girl comes up to us, shaking and looking like she had been crying. I could see the fear in her eyes as she pleaded with us to help her as she attempted to collect her dog from her husband who was drunk and threatening to kill the thing. We say sure, and the girl I'm with (who just got out of an abusive marriage) became her best friend that instant. After the guy comes out and talks her into coming inside, even though she really didn't want to, I decided this shit could get serious, pop the trunk and throw my .45 on. My friend Mike and i joke about how messed up this could get and how we might have to kick the door in to get her out The man was a former soldier and was a couple cans short of a six pack as we listened to his rantings and ravings of how he wants to kill himself, kill the dog and kill her all from the open bedroom window. He went on and on about how he doesn't believe his wife about where she went that night and the typical rants of someone who is insecure and unable to trust the woman he married. All of a sudden the fever pitch of the argument hit when she screamed for help and the guy slammed the window shut. We could hear heavy footsteps coming down the stairs and without a second though I sprung into action. Kicking the door with my army chick next to me. After three hard kicks the door rips open to reveal the guy holding an axe in the air about to chop the girl to bits!! I point the Kimber .45 right at him as my battle chick slips under me to grab the girl. I hear him shouts "What the fuck are you doing bitch!" obviously speaking to my sidekick. He doesn't notice that I have a pistol pointing at him. I tell him to "Freeze Bitch!" and he drops the axe almost immediately. We back out slowly with the girl and dog in tow, get them to her car as I covered the door and back toward my vehicle. I was thankful I didn't pull the trigger, but parts of me wanted to badly. This domestically violent piece of shit didn't deserve to have a nice wife. The next day she thanked me as she packed her things while he was at work. She tells me the cops are looking for me and that they were looking for her too. I tell her not to worry and that I'm leaving the country soon. I was glad to be out of Milwaukee after that incident. Just hearing her say thank you was all the justification of my actions. I know she'd be dead without out my intervention. But this was just the beginning of the Bogus Journey!! Check the New Zealand post!!

The first post: How I started 2011..

Instead of the ever lovable polar plunge dip at Bradford Beach to celebrate the new year after a night of partying at Stellar Spark and having Bloody Marys at Victors in the morning like a proud Miwaukeean, I found myself in Hong Kong celebrating New Years with a few friends before I head back to Korea for another year of teaching English.
This post is going to be more of an ongoing report to try and recall one of the worst blackouts I've ever had. I've blacked out before but this one is different. its nearly 24 hours later and I'm hungover but still feeling messed up. I'm pretty sure I got drugged as this could not have been facilitated by other methods I'm sure.
After heading off to see the rather disappointing fireworks display alone from a rooftop I scaled, I returned to the bar my friends were at. I was no feeling very festive however and felt better not to ruin there fun with my poor attitude. I recall drinking with Aussies at a 7-11 and I was at a bar or two dancing on the bar with others and having a grand time. This I can recall. However I have NO recollection of what preceded sitting down at a basketball court. I "woke up" nearly 10 hours later sitting in a diner near the 7-11. I lost my beloved Zippo and broke my watch. I'm also out nearly 700 HKD. Whether I spent it drinking or just plain lost it is anyone's guess. The biggest puzzlement is the bruising on my knuckles and the feeling I may have gotten into a fight or something.
More on this post as I begin to try and recall the night.